Giver and Taker
by Noelani618
Summary: My thoughts after seeing Magnificent Seven about Dean and Sam.


**Giver and Taker**

A drabble of my thoughts after Supernatural 3.1 "The Magnificent Seven". I don't own anything.

These were just the thoughts bouncing around in my head after the episode so I figured I'd write it down and see what people think. It isn't edited so please forgive any errors you may see.

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Giver and Taker

Dean acts without care, deliberately lusting and trying to protect Sam and Bobby while at the same time letting his life end. He is hiding the shame and yet the selfish need he had for his brother. When Sam confronted him outside that house he admits immediately that he was acting selfish but also that he was entitled to it considering all he had done for the family. It is true; Dean gave more than John or Sam ever did while he might not have lost a girlfriend or wife he did lose his mother, his childhood, his innocence long before Sam ever did. Dean stood between Sam and anything that came after him, including their father accepting the blows with a stone face.

Someone once said quite bluntly to Dean's face "Are you that screwed in the head?" Bobby nailed the issue dead on. Dean is screwed in the head. Trained to feel no self preservation but for his family, to let the needs of Sam forever eclipse his own it is of no surprise that he suddenly acts upon age old feelings long suppressed. He stated again to Sam that his is tired, so tired but wants to make the best of the last year he has. Dean is upfront with his brother whilst this time Sam is keeping huge secrets from his brother about the murder of Mary Winchester and what he was in the terms of the yellow-eyed demon: a king, a prince chosen by the devil. Ironic that he is reaming Dean out for being selfish when he is not even telling his brother the entire situation and what it could mean. Sam says he was bending over backwards to be nice to Dean about what happened but finally had enough. Really? Cause its seems Dean's been bending over backwards farther and a lot longer than he has.

Sam had four years to rest, to rejuvenate his value of human life as he lived among 'normal' people. For four years Sam avoided hunting and everything it involved letting his mind move on to other things. Dean, on the other hand, had no such rest. At nearly five years of age his life of normal, of rest was destroyed completely. Not even ashes remain. John did his best with the boys, training them to be the best of the best but in all that training he forgot to be their father enough to comfort his sons. Since John did not provide that vital part of parental responsibilities, Dean stepped up to the plate, taking it upon himself to give what he lost to his brother. Dean is tired because he has had no rest, no time to let his own needs, his dreams to become reality choosing instead to see Sam through the end.

After the deal he acts like its nothing and yet used it several times to try and convince Sam to come along with him, actually support him in what he wants to do and not chop him down. Dean just wants Sam to be happy, to find peace; he is a parent and a brother packaged in one. He isn't perfect, he's made many big mistakes including not telling Sam what John told him from the beginning. He learned and has been upfront about what happened when Sam demanded to know. It is a lost cause; Sam pays no attention to the way Dean treats him, as an equal when he reveals the truth about the deal. Sam doesn't understand that Dean is ultimately a tragic hero destined to fight even after he'd given everything he had to give and still be demanded more of. Sam may be the 'special one', with abilities and title that calls him a prince but he has never truly grown up. Sure it seems he is the more mature one when next to Dean's arrogant, cocky, dirty attitude but there is no bigger façade anywhere. The mask Dean wears comes from his childhood and is perfected beyond belief. He is too good at hiding; not even Sam truly sees him.

And that is what's so tragic. The one with all the power and grand destiny but the one who preserved him and taught him is the one who will pay the ultimate price.

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Well that's that. Please let me know what you think! 


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